


About Today

by Alcemistnv



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Grand Theft Auto Setting, F/M, Fake AH Crew, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-25
Updated: 2016-06-10
Packaged: 2018-06-10 15:02:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6961852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alcemistnv/pseuds/Alcemistnv
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ray doesn't want to let anyone get too close to him, and he's even considering leaving the Fake AH Crew if he falls further into their lure of being a "Family." At the moment, he's struggling with the idea of falling for Ryan, but he knows that he'll never get him, and if he does, that all he'll earn is a weak spot. And Ray Narvaez Jr. does not want to have any weak spots. Ryan, on the other hand, has some thoughts of his own that he has yet to voice.</p><p> </p><p>Pretty much Ray's thoughts and struggle as he tries to cope with falling for the mysterious murderer in the crew. And Ryan's struggle to fix the mess that he had made.<br/>---<br/>Title comes from About Today from The National</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You make my chest hurt

Ray could count on one hand, the times that he found himself falling for someone, and the number was same as all the times in which he realized he shouldn’t be. Work and personal lives were not meant to cross together, especially when you’re living the life of a criminal. Granted, Michael and Gavin were a thing, and so were Geoff and Jack, but all it did was open their weaknesses. All it would take was an outsider crew to know who was dating who for them to know their weak point. And Ray didn’t want to have any. He left his family behind and made sure that he lost all connections with people outside of the crew. And even within the crew, he didn’t want to grow close to anyone.

And yet here he was, his head resting on Michael’s lap as they challenged each other to a game of Minecraft. They settled on playing a round of “who can get to level 30 first” while the difficulty was set on hard, so it resulted in lots of swearing from both parties. Gavin was sitting next to Michael, his body turned so that his back rested on the other’s shoulder, and he was focused quite heavily on the laptop that was sitting on his legs. Opened bags of chips and half empty bottles of beer and soda were on the table, next to the controller Gavin was playing with before he gave up. 

Ray and Michael had been going at the game for a solid two hours before Michael threw the controller, shouting “FUCK!” while also laughing. “I got to level 27 before a spider killed me!” Ray grinned at him as he sat up, rolling his shoulders to get rid of the stiffness that had developed. He realized he hadn’t moved too much, the concentration needed for the game was too much, and so moving would only distract him.

“GG!” Ray walked over to shut off the console, stretching as he put the controllers back. He turned to look back at Michael, only to see him rubbing his face onto Gavin’s cheek. Internally gagging at the sight, Ray headed towards the entrance of the penthouse. Grabbing a pair of his iconic checkered sneakers, he slipped on his hoodie and headed out, giving a quick “later” to the two that were maybe kissing on the couch. Who knew at this point? And he wasn’t going to find out.  
Walking down the stairs and into the street, he felt like he had been jolted awake. He didn’t keep track of the time when he was playing with Michael, and so he didn’t realize that the sun was down, and the hustle and bustle of the Los Santos nightlife was starting. And since it was a Friday, it was even livelier. He decided to head over to Mount Chiliad, in hopes that it’d be empty of people and he could just enjoy the nighttime. Had anyone else been at the penthouse he wouldn’t have minded staying, but Jack and Geoff were out getting dinner and seeing a movie, and who knows where Ryan was.

Speaking of Ryan, he wasn’t around all that much anymore, which was affecting Ray more than he thought it’d do. Ray knew he was falling for the Vagabond, way harder than he wanted to. But he wasn’t ready to expose himself to anyone like that. Hell, even the times when he actually felt like he loved someone in the past, he up and left them because he didn’t want to let anyone near him. It was a psychological personal bubble, and if one person could get into it, then anyone could. Sure, Ryan was strong and could defeat anyone who’d even try to touch Ray, but Ray was only good at sniping and quick knife fights. He couldn’t protect anyone. He only worked well when he was with the crew. Alone he could only do so much. That’s why he let all those people in his past give up on trying to be with him, because he knew he wouldn’t be able to protect them.

He hopped down the stairs to the subway, scanning his card as the machine beeped- allowing him access to the station. The card wasn’t his, nor was it anyone’s for that matter. Gavin had made them dummy cards which had access to unlimited funds, but the account couldn’t be traced. If someone were to backtrack the access logs of the cards, they’d find out that the account holder’s profile was changed every time they’d do so. One of the highlights of Gavin’s genius was when Ray took the train after a heist. They knew the time that Ray had boarded the train and were able to cross reference the time he did and the time he swiped his card and the profile they found was that of a dead celebrity. Ray remembers laughing as the news bulletin lit up on the screen, stating “dead singer returns from the afterlife to rob a bank?” And to make it even better, they had a whole night segment on the ordeal, trying to find out exactly how someone who was dead could have had their long-expired account used. This was one of the times that Ray questioned the intelligence of the police because had they properly placed their cameras, they would’ve gotten a nice image of Ray looking dead at them, flipping them off.

With a screech, the train came, and after a few stops, it went. Ray stepped off the platform, ignoring the children and adults that pushed him out of the way. He pulled his hood back over his head, shoving his hands into his pockets. He exited the station, heading towards the city’s landmark. The penthouse was a few miles away at this point, and he knew that the mountain was as far as any of them would travel while alone. Any further and they’d have to incorporate the buddy system. All the way here, the cameras had invisible wires that connected them with Gavin’s computer system. But his range could only go so far, so if any of them were to be attacked whilst alone, they’d know that Gavin would find the attacker in no time. Sighing, Ray looked up at a nearby camera, before continuing on. A group of young women walked by, all laughing as they headed towards one of the local bars. The weather was perfect for him; it was in the mid-70s and there was no humidity whatsoever. Even wearing his hoodie might have been overkill for the weather. BEEP. A car honked and brought Ray out of his thoughts, realizing that he had approached a busy street.

Standing at the crosswalk, waiting for the lights to change, Ray looked ahead into the crowd of people hoping that maybe, just maybe, he’d see that familiar black and blue leather jacket. Just because he knew how dangerous and stupid it’d be if he and Ryan were a thing, he still appreciated being with the older man. His company was very well appreciated whenever they were doing a heist or simply when they just lounged in the penthouse. It was because of Ryan that he had learned how to navigate to Mount Chiliad without driving, or which trains to take to get him there and back the fastest. The Mountain was one of Ryan’s favorite places to visit and he recalled them driving up to the top, and then spending hours just watching the city. Sometimes they’d discuss heist plans or video games.

The traffic lights flashed and Ray crossed the street, pushing his hands further into his pockets. The conversations and sounds around him distracted him from getting too far into his thoughts, but the closer he got to the mountain, the quieter it got. He had a place where he liked to hang out- it wasn’t too far too walk, since most of the mountain’s best locations could only be accessed by car. And since he was definitely not capable of driving, he wasn’t going to attempt to steal a car to only crash it miles away from his destination. It was a bit of a uphill climb, which he was fine with considering he had been curled up onto a couch for most of the day. The sky was dark at this point, but the city was lit up, so only a portion of the stars could be seen.

Grunting, he climbed up the path, a bit peeved that he had realized now that he didn’t bring a flashlight. “God damn it Ray,” he swore to himself as he slid off of a rock. “Didn’t think to bring a fucking flashlight did you. Nope, you just had to walk out of the place without preparing and now you’re gonna fall and break your neck because DAMN IT THIS SUCKS!” he shouted as he slipped off of yet another rock, causing his whole body to slide down the path by a foot. The path was, as he had learned from Ryan, much easier to navigate with a light, and the flashlight app on his phone was doing very little to help. Shutting off the phone, he gave up, trying to once again go at it in the dark. After a few minutes of grunting and the utterance of multiple curses, he finally managed to reach his favorite spot. Only to see that someone was already there.

“Shit,” Ray dropped his shoulders in defeat at the appearance of the person. They were on the edge and all they were to him was a shadow, but no matter whether the person was young or old, man or woman, Ray didn’t care. They were in his favorite spot. “Guess I gotta be mean about this,” he sighed before reaching down for his hidden pistol. He placed his hand on the gun as he took a step forward, only to be silenced by the other person.

“You know, for a sniper you really aren’t that quiet when you’re not on the job.” The person spoke. Ray almost groaned in frustration when he realized the person he was about to threaten was Ryan. “Quite a surprise to see you here. I thought you were with the other lads.”

“Well I was, but then they got all lovey-dovey on me,” Ray walked over to the other man and sat next to him, legs spread out but hands tucked into his hoodie. “So I decided to come here, but I didn’t think that the all mighty Vagabond would be starwatching on his lonesome.”

Ryan gave a shrug and he might’ve sighed too but with the skull mask on, it was hard to tell. “I got bored, and wasn’t in the mood to kill anyone.”

“Well that’s a surprise,” Ray gave a forced chuckle and the two of them fell silent. Ray looked down at the ground, incredibly fascinated by the rocks that he was moving with his feet. And Ryan was staring off into the lights of the city, eyes focused straight ahead. Ray didn’t feel at all like he was accomplishing what he came here to do. He was planning on relaxing, and instead his insides felt like they were tied into knots. Being near Ryan made him feel this way, and he hated it. OH how he despised it. Because it meant that he was getting too close, too close for safety. Maybe he’d leave the crew for a few months and then come back and maybe Ryan would have someone. And that way he wouldn’t have to worry about falling for the mysterious killer.

And then a thought occurred in Ray’s head. The feeling isn’t mutual. He felt his gut sink and he was taken aback by how true the statement was. He could barely sit still when near Ryan, and sometimes his body would operate on its own, and he’d find himself leaning against broad shoulders, or his fingers would be dancing on Ryan’s legs or fingers. And when Ryan showed Ray what he looked like under the mask, Ray couldn’t keep the thought of “SHIT you’re hot,” to himself, and he nearly ran out of the room when he realized he had said it out loud.

But all of those actions were on sided. If Ray didn’t initiate the touches, Ryan would ignore him as if he was a ghost. Ryan wouldn’t go out of his way to talk to or be near Ray, in fact, he seemed to be indifferent to him, the same as how he was to the others in the crew. He had shown Ray his face first because he had scared Ray at one point with the skull mask and he insisted that he had to make it up to him. So there was no point in which Ray felt like Ryan had the same pangs in his chest when he was near the other. Pulling his legs up so that his knees were under his chin, Ray debated his options. He could sit here, near Ryan and suffer with his thoughts. Or he could leave now and just wander around the city. He gave it a few minutes of deliberating, as he looked out at the lights of the city. In the distance, a swarm of police cars had their lights on- the rotating blue noticeable amongst the pale whites and yellows of the streetlights. Probably another crew trying to make a stand for themselves, Ray thought to himself. Ryan shifted his leg slightly, which reminded Ray of his presence once more.

“I think I’m going to head back,” Ray decided. He stood up, ignoring the dirt and small rocks that clung to his pant legs and hoodie. “I guess I’ll see ya back at the place. Don’t know when I’ll be back, but I’ll make sure I’ll give a call if I plan on staying out late.” Ryan’s bright blue eyes started at him as he began to walk away, but they were closed as Ryan let out a sigh. Ray stopped in his steps and looked back at the other, confused.

“Ray, listen. We need to talk.”


	2. My Secret Weakness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Krispy Kreme is good. And hey, some development with Ryan.

Ray at that moment wanted nothing more than to just disappear. Ryan looked sad, no wait. Apologetic. It was the look that a little kid would give a parent after knowing they did something wrong. The eyes looking down, avoiding the gaze of the other in hopes that they wouldn’t get in trouble. And for some reason, Ryan was looking at Ray like that. That was just wrong. Ray decided to ignore the look and shrugged, turning around so his back was facing Ryan.  
“Listen, whatever it is I don’t think it’s important enough for me to hear. The Vagabond wouldn’t want to be sappy, now would he?” Ray laughed to himself for no reason at all. He couldn’t see Ryan, so he was unsure as to whether the other was agreeing with the statement or ignoring him. “As I said, I’m gonna go for a walk. Don’t wait up for me.” He officially walked away this time, not caring to see if Ryan was going to follow or not. And he didn’t. Ray had traversed the whole walk back to the train without looking back behind him to check if Ryan was there. “He’s probably still sitting on the mountain dumbfounded.”  
“Get back here!” A woman yelled as she ran past Ray, apparently chasing a young teen who was holding a purse that most definitely didn’t belong to him (“ _Way too flashy_ ,”) Ray thought to himself. The interruption from the woman had caused Ray’s thoughts to derail and he thought back to his feelings. He found a bench to sit on, away from other people, and brought his legs up to his face once again. This bench was his favorite place to think, far away from the train station just enough that he didn’t have to worry about people walking near him, and close to the park just in case he needed to run. And his number one reason was that it was across from his favorite donut place. He lost count of how many times he had sat at the bench with a bag of glazed donuts on his lap. And sometimes when he got high, he’d end up purchasing a whole dozen and would eat it all before he got back to the crew.  
Shuffling his body onto the seat, with arms wrapped in his hoodie and the hood over his head, he shut his eyes and let his mind run free. Ryan had wanted to talk to him, and from the tone he had adopted, it was something serious. Something that Ryan didn’t feel okay about. Had it been about a heist, there would’ve been a light within his eyes. But all Ray saw was sadness. He didn’t want to hear what Ryan had to say, because chances were it was about Ray’s feelings for him, but that’s IF he was able to pick up on that. There was no other reason for him to want to talk. Ryan didn’t normally talk to him other than those times Ray had said something first, so why would he want to do so now? He should just not talk to him at all.  
“You’re just overreacting,” Ray spoke to himself. “You’re just reading every situation and making it worse, like you’re some kind of middle school girl. ‘Oh Bobby doesn’t care for me because he was talking to Cindy and not me. Boo hoo I’ll never marry because Bobby was the man for me’,” he gave a light laugh. “ Just because Ryan doesn’t talk to you doesn’t mean he hates you, right? Maybe he’s just…oh I don’t know, completely out of my league. Or he’s just someone in your crew who is a highly wanted criminal more than all of us combined and he’s dangerous to get close to. Or maybe he doesn’t even like guys! Like I thought I didn’t.” Ray smacked his head against his knees in frustration. “It’s just overreacting that’s all. I’m sure this will all be fine tomorrow.”  
Bzzzzz. Bzzzzz.  
Ray reached into his back pocket and pulled out his cell phone. A smart phone that Gavin had tinkered with to prevent it from being traced, it was the one thing that Ray always needed to have at all times. “It connects me to you guys at all times,” he had told Geoff once. Unlocking the phone, a text message popped up from none other than the “Vagabond” himself. Ray opened it to see that it only contained two words: “Glazed donuts?” Suddenly alarmed, he hoped that Ryan hadn’t found him. No one knew about his particular fondness for the bench or the donut place, let alone donuts in general! Deciding against getting up and walking away, he pulled himself closer into his hoodie. With the night coming in, the park lights were on, but they did a poor job of lighting up the area. Placing his head against his knee once again, Ray just shut his eyes.  
Bzzzzz. Bzzzzz.  
“Ughhhh,” he groaned as he reached for the phone again. “Do you want glazed donuts?” Ray honestly contemplated responding before deciding to put the phone back into the pocket. “Screw you and your all-knowing ability.”  
“I wouldn’t call it an ability, just observation” A voice spoke behind Ray.  
“Shit!” He launched up from the bench, knife in his hand, pointed at the man behind him. “You need to stop putting yourself at the tail end of my weapon. One of these days you’re going to end up with a fucking bullet or knife lodged between your eyeballs,” he growled.  
Ryan gave a shrug while smiling. “Well if you say that, it just means that you doubt my ability to dodge, or to catch it before it hits me. How could a killer like me die from a mere knife?”  
“I don’t know, but we can find out the next time you do that,” Ray responded, putting his knife back away. “Why are you following me anyways? Have no other shit to do?”  
“Quite the opposite actually. I realized that my list of things I had to do before midnight was a lot longer than I thought. And I figured you’d be here too so I decided to stop by before my first errand.” He tossed a bag over to Ray who caught it, and immediately opened it up.  
“So uh,” He looked down at the bag of donuts. “How’d you know?” He asked sheepishly, trying to ignore the burning sensation that creeping up to his face, as well as the drooling he might have been doing.  
“Anytime we’ve passed by you make it so obvious that you want some. You don’t realize how long you actually stare at the store window when we walk by. Or the one time that you insisted we hit any store other than the donut shop because you stated that ‘it’s Michael’s favorite place to get dessert,’ when we all know that Michael doesn’t even like baked goods. I can keep it coming if you’d like. I’ve got lots more”  
“No.” Ray responded immediately. He didn’t want to know what else Ryan knew. “Thank you for the donuts though, like they’re seriously godlike. I don’t know who is making them in the back but I swear I won’t ever let anything happen to them.” He reached into the bag and then stopped, looking up at Ryan who stared back confusingly. “Listen, I’m sorry for earlier. I was an ass, I shouldn’t have really left like that. I guess I was still irritated about Gavin and Michael and I sorta took it out on you. And uh… yea,” he trailed off. There was silence between them, and Ray wished that Ryan would respond, so instead he just grabbed a donut from the bag and placed it in his mouth, holding it there as he folded the bag up with his hands.  
Suddenly, almost too quickly for Ray to consider safe, Ryan had approached Ray’s face, and bit down on the part of the donut that was hanging out of his mouth. A stuffed squeal came from Ray as he nearly dropped the bag, his reflexes allowing him to grab it before it had fallen. Ryan laughed as he walked by, half of a donut now in his hand.  
“Apology accepted,” he smiled at Ray before walking into the shadows.  
There were a few moments before the sound of the bag hitting the grass broke the silence.  
Ray stood dumbfounded by the bench, mind blank, but one thought continued racing through his mind.  
_Was that..some sort of kiss????_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading so far *finger guns of approval*

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! More will come soon, I promise. I'm over at alcemistnv on tumblr where I'll probably post drawings from particular scenes :p


End file.
